The days before I get my period are always the worst. I try to keep my hopes up, but the fact that yet another cycle has failed becomes increasingly hard to ignore. I rapidly leap from realizing that this cycle didn't work to predicting that no cycle will ever work.
But on CD2, cooler heads prevail. The past 16 months have taught me several good things about my and my husband's chances of conceiving a child. I know that:
- He's got sperm, of whatever quantity or quality, and at least some of it is capable of swimming up to and poking an egg.
- I have produced at least one egg at the time when my CBEFM said that I did.
- I am capable of building a uterine lining thick enough to allow implantation.
- I've got at least one clear tube.
But I also know that 18 months is long enough to try on our own. 18 months is a good, serious shot. 18 months is time to start looking for answers and possibly even solutions.
We're giving the unassisted baby-making a few more goes and then will visit our first RE at the end of August, right after our sixth cycle of TTC post-miscarriage and right after we get back from Scandinavia. I hope we get happy news before that point, but with only two cycles left, I'm prepared to begin testing.
And this is where you come in! I've done some preliminary research and am considering N.YU Fer.tility Center, based on their reputation and IVF results and the fact that they claim to accept my insurance. (My insurance covers testing and prescriptions but not procedures, so any iui or ivf would be out-of-pocket). I know that there are other good clinics out there, though, and I want to hear from NYC loss/IF bloggers. Please tell me who you see and why you like their practice. If you are not from NYC, never fear, I care about your opinion, too! How did you find your RE? What factors are important to consider when looking for one? How did you make your decision to start visiting a specific clinic?
With this info, I hope to schedule my appointment this month for the end of August. Scary, but exciting!
There's one other issue I'm looking for bloggy advice on. Over the 7 months since the miscarriage, I've put on some weight. Not enough to be "heavy," but enough to feel like my clothes don't fit great and I'm not happy with the way I look. I forced myself not to worry about the weight I was gaining because I didn't want to add stress to my life while we tried to get pregnant. But with that pregnancy who knows how many months away, I need to get back to liking the way I look and feeling good about my body again.
I want to lose 5-7 pounds and don't have a strict time frame in when it has to happen. Does anyone have any good weight-loss strategies? I belong to a yoga studio rather than a gym and I attend 2-3 classes a week. I try to eat healthily, though I do eat too many carbs and too much dairy, and I tend to snack when I'm in the 2ww and depressed. Any advice is appreciated--not just for the kinds of foods recommended to eat (most of which I can probably guess) but also for how to judge portions, figure out how much of what kinds of food to eat in a day, how to keep track of your calories and stuff like that.
By the end of the summer I want to be lean, relaxed, and pregnant, but I'll take the first two if that's all I can get.