A blog about babies: the babies I lost, the babies I never had, the baby who made me a Mama.

Friday, July 15, 2011

28 Weeks!; or Third Tri!!

I woke up this morning with sore hips after flopping back and forth all night trying to find a comfortable place to rest this heavy belly and waking four times by my outrageous need to empty my bladder.

Yup, I'm finally in my third tri! I love this milestone: 90% chance of survival with limited long-term complications after this point. Less than three months to go. Three months until I might be holding my baby boy or girl in my arms, giving him or her a name, kissing his or her sweet little face. I'm in awe that we've made it this far. Last July I was counting down the weeks until our first RE visit with anxiety, sadness, anticipation, and a lot of anger. Lawyer Guy wasn't doing much better. This July--as stressed as I admit I am by having so many huge events (massive grad school exam, sister's wedding, cross-country trip, baby prep and due date) crammed into three months--I wouldn't change a thing.

Every Friday morning LG comes and wakes me up and together we read on his laptop about Smudgie's development for that week. This morning felt a little bittersweet, since he leaves for his trial tomorrow. A few days ago, I was feeling very sad about the upcoming separation and spent most of the day crying. But now I'm trying to look on the positive side. Next weekend he'll be home from my ultrasound Friday afternoon until Sunday morning. Then it's a week alone at home, a week at my conference in California (where I'll be super busy, I'm sure), and a week relaxing and studying at my BFF Dr. Lady's house in San Diego. And then LG and I are together in Napa! We can get through this, and the final 8 weeks of the pregnancy will be even more wonderful after being apart for so long.

Smudgie's room is now a soft, gentle grey and his or her closet (that must be shared with LG and thus needed a lot of modifications) will be finished on Tuesday. We've ordered one or two pieces of furniture and are waiting to pull the trigger on several more. I'm so excited to set up my baby's nursery. And I'm also very nervous and scared.

Not that I think doing so will jinx anything or make anything bad happen to Smudgie--I know the world doesn't work like that. And not because I think having to dismantle a nursery would make the pain worse should anything go wrong from here out. Nothing could make the pain of something bad happening to Smudgie worse, and it's silly to even think so. But there's something so presumptuous and arrogant about setting up a nursery. Like I assume everything's going to work out for the best. And I don't. I want to, but I don't.

Still, as I keep telling myself, I don't want to let fear of what might happen poison my enjoyment of what is happening. Right now I am a 6+ month pregnant lady who is excited to start preparing for her baby's arrival, who wants to make a safe and comforting and happy space for the little one that will show just how much we love him or her. So I'm going to go with that.

Monthly pic is uploaded to Smudgie tab. Nursery photos to come after the remodelers return and take the giant step ladder, the plastic sheeting, and the tubs of paint and liquid sheetrock out of the center of the room.


  1. Yay! Congrats on the third tri Sloper, that's an awesome milestone:) You and Smudgie both look great in your 28 week pic...you are all baby.

    Sometimes if I put a folded up towel under my belly at night my hips hurt a little less. I think lifting my belly up a bit relieves some of the pressure. Might be worth trying?!!?

    Enjoy your last night with LG. I know it's going to be tough without him, but the time will fly by!

  2. AWWW!!!! I am glowing for you!!! Welcome to the third tri!

    I love this post, Sloper. It's realistic about your feelings but also (at least somewhat) optimistic. Which is SO awesome.

    You look amazing!!! :)

  3. OMG-- the 28wk pic!!!! I just want to smother your adorable belly with kisses.

    It is so sweet that you & LG read the development updates together every Friday. You can still do that while you're apart--you'll just need to Skype!

    Happy 3rd Tri honey, and congratulations on the biggest milestone yet!! Love you!!

  4. Are you by any chance going to the Dickens conference in California? (And congratulations on 3rd-trimester status!)

  5. Oh, Slopie, I love the story about your update date with hubs every Friday morning, so so sweet.

    I think you have a wonderful attitude about the upcoming travel stuff and being apart from your rock, LG. It is going to be SO AMAZING to be re-united at the end of all of this crazy-ness, and then you'll spend a blissful 8 weeks nesting together.

    And, as you know, I cannot WAIT to see how Smudgie's nursery turns out....I know it will be a wonderful, cozy, perfect little home for him/her. xoxo

  6. woo-hoo! third tri! you look great, and smudgie is really rounding out. i can't wait for you to hold him/her on the outside!

  7. On the flip side of your insane upcoming month, it'll make 1/3 of the last tri go by that much faster :)

  8. congrats on making it to T-3 so exciting!!

  9. I didn't believe anything was going to be right until I held my little daughter in my arms and went HOME with her! Then my husband and I had a sigh of relief. You enjoy as much of your pregnancy as you can and I'm sure all this running around will make it go faster and before you know it you'll be holding your little one too.

  10. So glad to hear that you are in the 3rd T, Sloper! And you're right - those last eight weeks are going to be sweeter for having been apart from LG.