I'm feeling completely disconnected from TTC right now-- and also to be honest, pretty disconnected from the blog/message-board world, too. I guess that's a good thing, if being active and engaged in our day-to-day lives is the ultimate goal. Lawyer Guy and I have been spending a lot of time together lately, hitting up movies (we saw The Kids Are All Right at a theater in Brooklyn where we sat next to a rather famous celebrity couple from our neighborhood), checking out new brunch spots, working on the apartment, exploring the neighborhood. I've been knee-deep in contractors for the past week (and for the week to come) as we make some needed home improvements (the subject of an upcoming blog post to be sure). I've been readying myself for our vacation next week and laying a major guilt trip over not getting enough writing done.
And meanwhile, I've been not ovulating. Not checking my cervical mucus. Not crying about it. Not particularly wanting to blog about it. Not googling about it.
I've been skipping my pre-natals and even forgetting to take my vitex. I suppose I'll ovulate eventually, maybe, probably. And I might even be before CD 28, which is the last day my CBEFM will be able to detect it. But if I don't...whatever. It's not like I would have gotten pregnant anyway.
The anniversary of the pregnancy is coming up, and that hurts if I let myself think about it. The RE appointment is coming up, and that's exciting if I let myself think about it. And there's always that teeny, tiny piece of me (maybe one of my finger joints? Or a toe bone? Or part of my inner ear?) that still thinks maybethiscouldbethemonth. So I'm pretty sure that I'll be back to hoping and tracking and obsessing and wishing and despairing soon enough.
But in the meantime...meh.
I'm back, and it's hopefully not a once-off!!
4 months ago