A blog about babies: the babies I lost, the babies I never had, the baby who made me a Mama.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Unexpectedly Expected; or, A Different Kind of Hopefulness

I'd come to expect the unexpected when dealing with my reproductive organs. Cycles of varying lengths were par for the course. Unpredictable ovulation times were routine. Even my luteal phase liked to keep me guessing. So waiting for my period to come post d&c isn't an unfamiliar experience to me. A 4-8 week timeframe? Yeah, I'm used to that. And I fully expected it to fall in the latter range.

What's not expected is this: two days shy of the four week mark, I'm crampy, bloated, and spotting just a little bit.

This could be nothing. It's probably just my uterus smacking me around a little more. But if I get my period this week, right on schedule--heck, even early!--I'll feel the kind of hopefulness I haven't experienced since the morning I peed on my first positive pregnancy test. Since the day we decided, "Let's make a baby."

I never thought I would look forward to peeling off a tampon's paper wrapping with so much relish.


  1. I started my first period after miscarrying exactly 28 days after losing the baby. It made me so happy, too, which I found to be quite strange at the time, but now I realize I was happy much for the reason you're describing....my body is back on schedule ALREADY and that only means ONE thing.....try, try again. :)

  2. I was the same - exactly 28 days after the start of both of my misscarriages. It does give you back hope in your body. I found the first period backa good cleansing and healing time; I hope it is for you too.

  3. I'm so glad to hear that we'll be starting cycle 8 around the same time, friend!!