tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post8454507912108548204..comments2023-05-09T02:54:19.314-07:00Comments on Park Slope Promised Land: Wild Man Blues; or, Three WeeksSecret Sloperhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16007764157682145537noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-75703897549600032452011-10-30T22:12:14.839-07:002011-10-30T22:12:14.839-07:00Love the fall duds :)
Honestly, I'd take dail...Love the fall duds :)<br /><br />Honestly, I'd take daily sterilizing of bottles off the to-do list. Is it really necessary? Are they being rubbed in plague? I've never understood why simply *washing* bottles - like one would any other dish - isn't sufficient. But I'm a wild and noncompliant woman.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-11274604297866424322011-10-29T16:01:02.295-07:002011-10-29T16:01:02.295-07:00Oh, Sloper, he is SO BEAUTIFUL. I am so moved by h...Oh, Sloper, he is SO BEAUTIFUL. I am so moved by his wise little face!<br /><br />I am glad you are doing so well and am sorry about the 'wild-man' phases. Does it work to put him in his car seat and swing it by hand? That's the only thing that worked for us when Penelope was like that. Oh and the vacuum cleaner of course! Such memories of standing in a dark room in the middle of the night with the vacuum running, doing arm-curls with Penelope in her car seat... I can't believe that those are now FOND memories, and I miss those days!!<br /><br />As for the carriers, neither the Moby nor the Ergo has ever worked for me. The Bjorn has been absolutely the best for us. Actually, it's the only one that has worked so far. Good luck getting out! But don't worry about vegging out-- you deserve it!Lesleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01015353387009923240noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-69938898953482282602011-10-27T08:50:52.049-07:002011-10-27T08:50:52.049-07:00Sloper, your post brings back so many memories of ...Sloper, your post brings back so many memories of my first months with my older son. I had recently finished my PhD and, until just a few weeks before his birth, had been working a fulltime job plus part-time adjuncting. The switch to "all baby, all the time" mode was dizzying and disorienting, and like you, the sense that I should be doing MORE, or doing what I was doing BETTER, sometimes impinged on relishing the fruits of what had been, essentially, an additional job: the process of getting and staying pregnant, after a long battle with infertility.<br /><br />One piece of perspective did help, though I wish I'd been able to internalize it better at the time. You've probably heard the theory that the first few months are really the "fourth trimester," when the baby really should still be inside you, in developmental terms, but has to come out due to evolutionary changes in head/brain size. That's why it makes so much sense just to sit around and hold your baby as much as he wants. Read a bunch of trashy books that aren't on your dissertation bibliography! Watch the movies and TV series on DVD that you haven't had a chance to see! Wallow in it! In a couple of months, things will be different.<br /><br />I also echo others' comments about trying out different carriers AND getting out of the house. I was reduced to tears by the Ergo when I borrowed one from a friend who sang its praises, and I still don't know if it was the Ergo itself or my frayed nerves and sleep-deprived brain. I had the best luck with a Baby Bjorn because it was so simple, and it was easy to unsnap it and put my son down on a bed when he fell asleep in it. (Plus, it was easily adjustable when my husband wanted to wear it.) Putting the baby in a carrier during his crazy times--both my sons had those--really helped with calming down. I'd often wear the babies around the house for several hours while doing various tasks, or go outside and walk, with a large coat around both of us.<br /><br />One of the other best pieces of advice I got as a new mother was to try to get outside somewhere every day, and that's also where coming up with a workable carrier solution helps. Coffee shops, where I could discreetly nurse, then hold a sleeping baby while I drank something, had a snack, and read, were great. I had a whole circuit of places like that: coffee shops, public library, family area at a mall. I may just have been lucky, but I also found that these forays led to many random conversations with strangers that were surprisingly affirming and sanity-boosting.Heidihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02927503132840768706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-84932198595079772402011-10-27T07:15:58.942-07:002011-10-27T07:15:58.942-07:00I think it sounds like you're doing a great jo...I think it sounds like you're doing a great job, really. And, I definitely say go with your instincts right now.Rebeccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05382638658909144208noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-23177593236217856742011-10-27T05:48:47.924-07:002011-10-27T05:48:47.924-07:00I totally remember those days....sometimes I would...I totally remember those days....sometimes I would feel guilty sleeping for 10 minutes while the babies napped, b/c I thought I should be cooking/cleaning/making a baby book/etc. It's hard not to feel that way! At around 4 weeks old I finally figured out how to get them both out of the apartment (we live on a 3rd floor walk up but have the luxury of being able to keep a stroller in the entryway) and that made the world's BIGGEST difference in my mental state. Being able to get fresh air, and maybe even accomplish a minor errand (grabbing something at the drugstore, for instance) felt so.freaking.good.<br /><br />You're doing awesome and I know it's going to feel better as you go. <br /><br />PS We tried not to think about night sleep until they passed 8 weeks old, but that's reaaaally hard when you're ragged with sleep deprivation. Don't don't don't feel bad getting rest whenever/wherever you can! xoxoAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-62993465801089904052011-10-26T20:45:44.328-07:002011-10-26T20:45:44.328-07:00You sound like a new mom and so that means 'yo...You sound like a new mom and so that means 'you're going up from here!" I swear to you it gets better and better and easier and easier until they start wanting to talk and walk at the same time and you have to understand their gibberish because they will scream. Soon you'll be understanding that all kids, ok most kids, fall into a pattern and you'll figure out what that pattern is and you'll be out and about eating, walking, sipping coffee and showing him the world all at the same time. p.s. PUT THE BOOKS DOWN! LOLLoredanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10281756601492887263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-36329718857239720492011-10-26T19:24:00.782-07:002011-10-26T19:24:00.782-07:00I am a person who always has to be doing something...I am a person who always has to be doing something productive, so I can imagine that it's frustrating for you right now to just BE. Sounds like you and Smudgie are doing great though! Thanks for sharing the pic!aplusefforthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12142056896638707180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-39257600083398147572011-10-26T18:07:54.595-07:002011-10-26T18:07:54.595-07:00my little one has that wildman thing too, the carr...my little one has that wildman thing too, the carrier saved my life. take your time though, learn how to use it and dont worry aboutthe guilt. I have done Noooooooooothing around the house, it sucks but the baby is too high matenance right now BUT that will change.tishihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05652109105463448687noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-11945299397276790272011-10-26T17:17:14.982-07:002011-10-26T17:17:14.982-07:00I agree with the previous poster about the newborn...I agree with the previous poster about the newborn insert. I have one you can borrow if you'd like. I didn't realize you needed one and bought it when D was a little over a month, but we only used it until she was around 4 months. <br /><br />The guilt is unfortunate, but normal. You're doing the best for Smudgie and you're a great mom. He won't care if there is dust on the end tables.MVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04441193233521229316noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-46683794451252776352011-10-26T14:18:20.287-07:002011-10-26T14:18:20.287-07:00I'm working on my 2nd baby and don't worry...I'm working on my 2nd baby and don't worry about sleep training for a few more months. Like 5 or 6. You can't sleep train a newborn. I have a 6 month old and I can handle a little crying but when she really ramps up it is physically painful to me. Just do what feels right to you. Good luckNhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06248293979879390754noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-26481850354171671332011-10-26T14:01:31.095-07:002011-10-26T14:01:31.095-07:00Gorgeous bub! I love the photo. I'm going thro...Gorgeous bub! I love the photo. I'm going through some of the same time warp that you are - it's very strange. But I'm still on this side of the "help" hurdle - Mr. D only goes back to work next week. I know it's going to be tough, though.<br /><br />Those carriers require practice. Especially now when they're still so...floppy? We tried with our Beco and had to leave it to another day. As far as the perfectionism thing/cleaning the apartment/etc... I have moments of that, too. But, Mama, you worked too hard to get here, and went through all those months of the pregnancy, not to mention the labor...you deserve to ignore the dust. (Actually, you deserve a cleaning service which will also miraculously install an elevator).Adelehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06955659206478903815noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-49629985026465964442011-10-26T13:01:59.039-07:002011-10-26T13:01:59.039-07:00I don't think u can sleep train a baby that yo...I don't think u can sleep train a baby that young so don't sweat it, really. Yes, get a friend with same carrier to come over and help you figure out how to get it on and then practice by yourself in front of her. I never liked mine but I had a low end one. Though I am told some babies like enough that you can wear and do all sorts of things around the home at same time. <br /><br />Don't sweat state of your apt ... Seriously, short of bugs or fire or tripping hazards, nobody cares, including visitors. <br /><br />Aim for one mini-outing a day...get a bagel, dessert, etc. get some fresh air to help Mommy maintain her perspective - it helps!Ms. Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04734867984972785143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-772803511129298532011-10-26T12:27:34.176-07:002011-10-26T12:27:34.176-07:00the ergo carrier is the greatest BUT one thing i d...the ergo carrier is the greatest BUT one thing i didn't realize is that i needed the newborn insert. do you have that? and i'm an idiot and didn't realize that their little feet need to be sticking out - just be smart and look at pictures instead of trying to stuff your baby into a burrito like i did :) also, sleep training - everyone told me DO NOT try to sleep train until four months and they were ALL RIGHT. if your baby is most comfortable sleeping on you, with you, in his crib, in a bassinet, it doesn't matter - do whatever you have to do to maximize his and YOUR sleep. i read healthy sleep habits, happy child and it helped a lot from the perspective of knowing that every 1-2 hours, my baby needed to sleep. that was so so helpful - i knew if she was fussy after a couple of hours, she needed to sleep. i could write about this for DAYS (my babe is almost 5 months old) - but whatever you do is the RIGHT thing - God gave you that baby, trust yourself!briannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17662611951421564452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-90224067219499331232011-10-26T11:35:37.780-07:002011-10-26T11:35:37.780-07:00he is too cute, love those socks :) hoping you ge...he is too cute, love those socks :) hoping you get the hang of things soon, can you get down with him in one of those slings or baby bjourn carriers?cdghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13174907373129154516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-1267854584309033312011-10-26T11:26:44.230-07:002011-10-26T11:26:44.230-07:00Cuteness! Love the picture!
I agree that just bei...Cuteness! Love the picture!<br /><br />I agree that just being in the moment is the best thing. Just enjoy where you are right now.Jemhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10480192191711301637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-18211118109869188252011-10-26T11:15:00.905-07:002011-10-26T11:15:00.905-07:00Do you have friends with other types of carriers? ...Do you have friends with other types of carriers? Keep trying them on until you find one you like. Getting out of the house every day, even if it's just for an hour or two to meet a friend for lunch or go to the grocery store, will do you a world of good. Good luck!Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12968552563048632268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-5376562711787459692011-10-26T10:54:55.815-07:002011-10-26T10:54:55.815-07:00My Mom's only piece of advice to me was that y...My Mom's only piece of advice to me was that you can't love your baby too much... and if what feels right to you and to him is feeding him on demand, picking him up and holding him when he's crying, and doing things YOUR way instead of the way a stupid book says, then go with it. That's my plan... we'll see how it goes. :) Soon you'll look back at these days and miss all the chances you had to just sit around and hold your cuddly baby and "accomplish" nothing more important (cuz really, what's more important than that anyway?!). <br /><br />Hang in there - it's good to hear from you!Joshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13423295019681051881noreply@blogger.com