tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post5036358074241841598..comments2023-05-09T02:54:19.314-07:00Comments on Park Slope Promised Land: The Course of True Friendship; or, Being ThereSecret Sloperhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16007764157682145537noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-7464266051838446612010-05-11T05:56:39.891-07:002010-05-11T05:56:39.891-07:00That sounds like a wonderful friend. I'm missi...That sounds like a wonderful friend. I'm missing that a bit, my friends are all miles away, and we're not in touch that often. My fault as much as theirs, though...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-1572043259921565932010-04-30T15:55:57.292-07:002010-04-30T15:55:57.292-07:00I wanted to let you know that this brought me to t...I wanted to let you know that this brought me to tears. You have a wonderful friend. I'm also going to tell you that having that friend is a tremendous blessing. I fear that my high school bff has a baby and has kept her distance after. We both had miscarriages but one worked out for her and it's a bit too fresh for her to keep up with my now *many* failures. Also, a funny story where the only new woman I've met in real life was just fired. I was hoping to find a new friend but it turns out she was just a new crazy. (I guess throwing yourself at all males married or no on a business trip to Vegas can hurt your career. Yes, what happens in Vegas most certainly does not stay in Vegas.)Mrs. Misfitshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12245258330689439524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-8671974716628612882010-04-29T14:44:59.909-07:002010-04-29T14:44:59.909-07:00It's awesome that you have her in your life. ...It's awesome that you have her in your life. I am currently dealing with how to relate/interact with my friend who lost her IF battle--(no more money/tapped out). I'll try to take pointers from your friend and just be there more often.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16239548717452353436noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-26972870903236093982010-04-29T11:14:32.115-07:002010-04-29T11:14:32.115-07:00Awwww, that was lovely! I feel like with my BFB th...Awwww, that was lovely! I feel like with my BFB there's no real solution. If she asks me how I'm doing, I don't always want to talk to her about it. 'Cause how could she possibly understand? And I guess I resent her in some ways (while understanding it's in no way her fault) so she's the last person I want to discuss it with. On the other hand, if she doesn't ask, I feel like she's a selfish cow. And TOTALLY, I had to talk about things I did NOT want to hear about just to try to be there for her. Just like she had to NOT talk about things she was probably brimming over about for my sake. I figure it all comes out pretty even. Though I also figure having a miscarriage makes it a million times harder...In any event, it's clear you've been a stellar friend to her, and I'm happy you're feeling like she's been supporting you too!bunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07197167351148883584noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-25603867295802669802010-04-29T11:00:03.848-07:002010-04-29T11:00:03.848-07:00This post really touched me. I love how, in the en...This post really touched me. I love how, in the end you realize that (despite everything) she's been there for you all along. I recently went through a similar epiphany with my best friend. It's a different situation because she isn't married nor does she have children, but I would get resentful at times because I felt as though she was neglecting me. It took me a lot to realize that this wasn't the case--that she really was one of my biggest supporters through infertility. And I am so grateful to have her, as I am sure you are just as grateful for your friend.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-13613964820822839842010-04-29T10:51:49.828-07:002010-04-29T10:51:49.828-07:00I am so afraid for this day for myself-- it is com...I am so afraid for this day for myself-- it is coming soon. I also have a 3000 mile away best friend (in Brooklyn, actually- we could theoretically swap besties, for convenience's sake :)), who will start trying in September. She keeps saying that she hopes we get pregnant together, and every time she says it, I get this feeling like someone is ripping my gut cavity open with their bare hands. <br /><br />Riiiipppp.... gush... oh! <br /><br />And you are already there. PAST there. Well, my friend, you will be the one I lean on (and Bunny, she's got the BFB right next door!) when it happens to me.<br /><br />Hearing it put this eloquently has me a bit prepared, but I just don't know... sometimes I fantasize about her future baby to prepare myself, and this tear-laden fantasy definitely qualifies as melodrama, but I can't know what the real emotions will be.Lesliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12445064184402702224noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-82792763649585430382010-04-29T10:37:47.485-07:002010-04-29T10:37:47.485-07:00That kind of had me tearing up a little. Thanks fo...That kind of had me tearing up a little. Thanks for such a sweet post. What a good friend you have.Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08482387222906180900noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-85521196842533628742010-04-29T10:27:37.065-07:002010-04-29T10:27:37.065-07:00Such a lovely post, and your bestie totally sounds...Such a lovely post, and your bestie totally sounds like a keeper. I have a bestie much like yours and she's been there for me through this whole process. And you're so right, sometimes I appreciate that she doesn't make my ttc journey the topic of all our convos...but when I do feel like talking about it she's ready to listen. So yes, just being there is sometimes the key!! Thinking of you this tww!!!Basic Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03949810121076136586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-70016361487959648332010-04-29T10:26:35.905-07:002010-04-29T10:26:35.905-07:00Thanks for writing this post and sharing your refl...Thanks for writing this post and sharing your reflection of your friendship. It's beautiful that you can look back and realize that she's been a listening ear for you every step of the way and every way that she could be for you as you've healed and continue to heal from your miscarriage.<br /><br />I can see a lot of what you're saying in my relationship with my sister, even though my sister's delivery isn't the best, she calls me every week to check in and just talk to me about what's going on with her. She never really brings up the pain of IF and PG loss without me bringing the topic up b/c she doesn't want to upset me. I finally figured that out on Tuesday and it made me feel so much better to know she was thinking about it and was just trying to be there for me if I wanted to talk about it. I thought she had trying to avoid the issue when all along she was just trying to protect me.ALhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09150067629614839175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-37532305872702075522010-04-29T10:20:38.525-07:002010-04-29T10:20:38.525-07:00Awww...that's sweet. I'm glad you have a ...Awww...that's sweet. I'm glad you have a person in your life like that. I have a couple, and I'm ever-so thankful for them.Fidgeting Gidgethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03903926675948152931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-14274405681348613382010-04-29T10:03:39.979-07:002010-04-29T10:03:39.979-07:00ahh, the *that which must not be named* thing happ...ahh, the *that which must not be named* thing happens an awful lot with me the few friends who know. they kinda tiptoe around me, not wanting to ask, but not wanting to ignore either, but kinda prodding me, but not really, to talk about it if i want. and usually, i don't want. so then we fake talk about other stuff. lately, i have no more to say when someone asks me how i am, other than "good. i'm good." and then the "what's going on with you?" then i'll say "not much. not much". REALLY. BORING. CONVERSATIONS. can you tell?<br /><br />your friend sounds quite lovely! her frequent and consistent phone calls to check in make her sound like a keeper for sure :o)siennahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16982230898962770375noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1370623155565789372.post-69241313535781650662010-04-29T09:55:33.462-07:002010-04-29T09:55:33.462-07:00Doctor Lady sounds like a good friend. Like you, m...Doctor Lady sounds like a good friend. Like you, my best friend and I do a lot of pretending about The Thing That Is There But Must Not be Mentioned (Often). Some days I think it means the end of our friendship, some days that our friendship will survive even this. <br /><br />Like you say, the fact that she has been there, that she has called - even if she's not asking the explicit questions - is worth a lot. This is a lovely post.Adelehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06955659206478903815noreply@blogger.com